I believe the answer is simple but often overlooked. Today’s world is dominated with outward appearance.
As a woman, society tells me, “It is okay to be the real me, as long as it is the one they tell me to be”.
So if you want to be a beautiful woman, buy this, change that, lose weight, add heels. Be societally acceptable. Then, if you are lucky, they will tell you if you are beautiful yet.
It almost makes me want to break into the Brittany Spears song “Piece of Me”.
First, those who start working as escorts are normal women. Their reasons for choosing sex work are their own. Their beauty is not part of the deciding process. Therefore, the answer to the why and beautiful is realised when we explore the rules society tries to place on our perception of beauty.
We are not taught to expect beautiful but instead it has to be earned or made. So we actively compare ourselves and each other looking for faults. How often do we compliment our self or speak disapprovingly about another person’s appearance?
Society creates an unattainable idea of beauty through negative reinforcement. Yet it is sold as if it is beneficial. “Of course you’ll get a girl/boyfriend if you change by buying/doing this”.
So while we may look for someone beautiful in everyday life, we are also looking for their faults.
But here is the kicker.
The reason why you see so many beautiful women in the sex industry is because society tells us to expect beauty. We compare who is the most beautiful woman instead of who is least.
In truth, these women look and are the same women you find dressed up in nightclubs, passing you in the street, reading a book in the library or sitting on your bus. There is zero difference in the beauty of those in the industry and those who are not. Have a closer look both sides and you will see it is so.
I personally learnt this one day I was working. It started when I was about to order a chai before work. I was in jeans and a T-Shirt with a ponytail. A fellow in a pressed business suit strode in and barked for his coffee as I was just opening my mouth. All I got when I spoke up was a glance up and down, and with a slight look of superiority. Dismissively, he turned and walked off. He was judging my ‘status’ by my clothes not really seeing me. I was not a happy girl, but I do love a coincidence.
Mine was later that week at work. He walked in the door. Besides a dress and my hair down, I looked the same. Still, he didn’t recognise me. Not surprised. Instead, he proceeded to tell me first of how important he was, and second how beautiful he found me. I let him talk. He called me beguiling. He mused why I did this job and even suggested coffee because ‘any man in his right mind would take me out’. I almost laughed in his face. That’s where I stopped him, shut him down and wandered off. Another girl took my seat. My ‘beauty’ was the same. What he rated it on was different.
The same concept also exists in the “chaste” and “unchaste” woman idea. People see what they decide to see. It is individual tastes but also how value is placed on societal rules . The beautiful part though, that was always there, it is just what the beholder desires to see.